{"id":3992,"date":"2020-08-11T16:09:38","date_gmt":"2020-08-11T16:09:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/?p=3992"},"modified":"2022-09-02T16:37:38","modified_gmt":"2022-09-02T16:37:38","slug":"role-playing-about-bullying","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/","title":{"rendered":"Role-Playing About Bullying with Your Child"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"s-share-buttons\" class=\"horizontal-w-c-circular s-share-w-c\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to Facebook\" class=\"s3-facebook hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=Role-Playing About Bullying with Your Child&url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" target=\"_blank\"  title=\"Share to Twitter\" class=\"s3-twitter hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/plus.google.com\/share?url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" target=\"_blank\"  title=\"Share to Google Plus\" class=\"s3-google-plus hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.digg.com\/submit?url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" target=\"_blank\"  title=\"Share to Digg\" class=\"s3-digg hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/reddit.com\/submit?url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/&title=Role-Playing About Bullying with Your Child\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to Reddit\" class=\"s3-reddit hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/shareArticle?mini=true&url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to LinkedIn\" class=\"s3-linkedin hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.stumbleupon.com\/submit?url=https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/&title=Role-Playing About Bullying with Your Child\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to StumbleUpon\" class=\"s3-stumbleupon hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.tumblr.com\/share\/link?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.respectu.com%2Fhome%2Frole-playing-about-bullying%2F&name=Role-Playing+About+Bullying+with+Your+Child\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to Tumblr\" class=\"s3-tumblr hint--top\"><\/a><div class=\"pinit-btn-div\"><a href=\"\/\/www.pinterest.com\/pin\/create\/button\/\" data-pin-do=\"buttonBookmark\"  data-pin-color=\"red\" title=\"Share to Pinterest\" class=\"s3-pinterest hint--top\"><\/a><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<script type=\"text\/javascript\" async defer src=\"\/\/assets.pinterest.com\/js\/pinit.js\"><\/script><a href=\"mailto:?Subject=Role-Playing%20About%20Bullying%20with%20Your%20Child&Body=Here%20is%20the%20link%20to%20the%20article:%20https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/role-playing-about-bullying\/\" title=\"Email this article\" class=\"s3-email hint--top\"><\/a><\/div><p style=\"text-align: right;\"><span style=\"font-size: 11px; font-weight: normal;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-3994\" src=\"http:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/Role-Playing-About-Bullying.jpg\" alt=\"African American father Role-Playing About Bullying \" width=\"848\" height=\"565\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/Role-Playing-About-Bullying.jpg 848w, https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/Role-Playing-About-Bullying-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.respectu.com\/home\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/Role-Playing-About-Bullying-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 848px) 100vw, 848px\" \/>Copyright: <a href=\"https:\/\/www.123rf.com\/profile_digitalskill\">DigitalSkill\/123RF Stock Photo<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<h2>Role-playing about bullying is important to help her rehearse what\u00a0to say and do when bullying does occur.<\/h2>\n<p>Forget about insulting or threatening the bully.<\/p>\n<p>Forget about telling your child to \u201cjust ignore it.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Cute\u201d and snappy comebacks are tough to pull off, but possible if your child feels comfortable with this strategy.<\/p>\n<p>These examples are high-risk and likely to make your child look too affected by the bully\u2019s words or actions. Even \u201cignoring it\u201d usually is a reaction. When a child is clearly pretending not to hear or see, it\u2019s a fun challenge for the bully to get louder and more abusive. It\u2019s funny to the bully that she\u2019s gotten to the target enough that she feels she has to pretend not to hear. And more often than not, the child is not a very good ignorer.<\/p>\n<p>There is usually plenty of body language to tell the bully that bad behavior is working.<\/p>\n<p>What\u2019s important is to instill a sense in the child that the bullying child\u2019s remarks and behaviors honestly don\u2019t matter . . . therefore, you don\u2019t need to pretend not to see or hear, you don\u2019t need to argue or cry; you can just give a little grin and reply, \u201cSay whatever you like\u201d and leave it at that, or even\u2014gasp!\u2014agree with the bully if the teasing isn\u2019t too bad. Think of how many comedians America loves who rely on self-deprecating humor.<\/p>\n<p>Jay Leno doesn\u2019t get offended when people tell him he has a big chin. He agrees with them and even exaggerates it to make jokes about himself.<\/p>\n<p>Rodney Dangerfield made a career of insulting himself\u2014probably playing off the comments children once made about him. If your child is going to confront the bully, whatever your child chooses to say must be said as unemotionally as possible.<\/p>\n<p>Bullies absolutely love it when a child is frothing at the mouth, panting, crying, yelling, stomping away . . . that virtually ensures that the harassment will continue.<\/p>\n<p>Practice the tone of voice with your child. If your child has a favorite \u201ccool\u201d celebrity, it might help to pretend to be that celebrity when delivering the lines. Work with your child on portraying confidence\u2014standing straight, looking people in the eye, speaking calmly, and firmly.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Here are some acceptable lines your child might use, depending on his level of comfort and resilience: <\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Say whatever you like about me.<\/li>\n<li>Maybe you\u2019re right.<\/li>\n<li>Okay, whatever you say.<\/li>\n<li>Thanks!<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>If your child feels a little stronger and can use body language to stand up straight to bullies and look them in the eye, more assertive responses are possible:<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>That\u2019s enough.<\/li>\n<li>I\u2019m not interested in fighting.<\/li>\n<li>Please stop now.<\/li>\n<li>This isn\u2019t funny to me.<\/li>\n<li>Knock it off.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><strong>Tell your child not to use these words which convey too much emotion or are too threatening and will probably produce the opposite of the desired result: <\/strong><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Shut up.<\/li>\n<li>You\u2019re stupid.<\/li>\n<li>You\u2019re a jerk.<\/li>\n<li>That\u2019s not true!<\/li>\n<li>Am not.<\/li>\n<li>I\u2019m telling.<\/li>\n<li>My big brother\/father\/neighbor\/friend could beat you up.<\/li>\n<li>Liar!<\/li>\n<li>Get away from me.<\/li>\n<li>I hate you.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>Don\u2019t Get Touchy-Feely When Role-Playing About Bullying<\/h2>\n<p>Sensitive kids expect other kids to be sensitive. When they\u2019re not, often the sensitive kid wants to tell the bully how she feels, particularly when they\u2019re young and the bullying is verbal. (\u201cYou hurt my feelings.\u201d \u201cI don\u2019t like it when you say that!\u201d \u201cStop, you\u2019re making me upset.\u201d) Some parents encourage this, too, believing that if the bully just understood that the words or behaviors were hurtful, they\u2019d stop.<\/p>\n<p>This is wishful thinking and works only when you\u2019re not dealing with a true bully.<\/p>\n<p>True bullies don\u2019t have empathy\u2014at least not for your child. They do not care that they\u2019ve hurt your child\u2019s feelings . . . in fact, that\u2019s exactly what they want. So if your child expresses that his feelings are hurt, it\u2019s just as good as your child saying, \u201cWay to go! You\u2019re accomplishing your goal. Please, keep it up! I might fall apart any second! Get popcorn!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>It\u2019s extremely hard for good people to believe that anyone could be so cruel at heart, especially children. We want to believe just talking to them and helping them understand the effects of their behavior can turn them all around. Some of them can and will learn empathy, sure. Others never will. But your child isn\u2019t there to be a teaching tool after the first time if he continues to be upset by bullying behavior.<\/p>\n<p>This advice does not apply if your child is normally friends with the person who\u00a0is now doing the bullying (or was once friends with the person): In that case, it may be that the friendship can be repaired and the bullying behaviors can stop if the children sit down and talk to each other about what\u2019s going on. But if you\u2019re dealing with a child who is a stranger to you, or someone who\u2019s never been nice to your child in the past, it\u2019s probably best that your child does not purposely let this bully know that her feelings are hurt.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Role-playing about bullying Is important to help her rehearse what\u00a0to say and do when bullying does occur. Forget about insulting or threatening the bully. Forget about telling your child to \u201cjust ignore it.\u201d Cute\u201d and snappy comebacks are tough to pull off, but possible if your child feels comfortable with this strategy.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[92,89],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v23.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Role-Playing About Bullying with Your Child - Bullying Speaker, Counselor &amp; Expert<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Role-playing about bullying Is important to help her rehearse what\u00a0to say and do when bullying does occur. 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